Tuesday, June 29, 2021

Your Guide To Easy Reading


And Lo! An index was born.

!NEW! posts are marked accordingly in there respective categories. History. Science. Fiction. Horror. Comedy. Pop Culture. Commentary. Interviews. DIY's. Lots to see so have fun.

My Amazon Author page with collections of some of my favorite work, plus my novel "Saint Five", can be found here: CLICK HERE 
I also have a YouTube channel. CLICK HERE.
Be well!

And so should you!

The Wedding Piece (Southern Gothic for Tracey and Alex)
They are at the window again  (It's a love story. With zombies.)
The Death of Joe Average  (What happens when the deathtrap works?)

-Read this first-   
A most delightful...dump. 

Potatoes are what we eat. Potatoes are what we ride


"The Second Going" by Yeets   !NEW!
The 2020 Post: Humans, History, and Hope.   !NEW!
A 500-Hundred-Year-Old Rhythmic Rump is Music to the Ears
Chipping Away at the History of the Potato Chip 
The US Government's UFO interest just got weirder  
Voyager 1 fires thrusters silent since Jimmy Carter was President 
For Those Lost, Those Hurt, And Those Who Fight 
Romancing the (Rosetta) Stone
Total Eclipse (of the heart) 2017
Will the real Rosie the Riveter please stand up? 
The World is But a Stage(coach) for Mary
Words Have Meaning
Of What Weight is a Piece of Infinity?  
Planet X, you say? 
Home(stead) for the Holidays
Local necropolis, er, cemetery. 
Local necropolis, er, cemetery. PART 2 
When Superman fought the KKK  
iVon Daniken 
How Fast The Great Pyramid - Let's run the numbers.


ROM the Spaceknight is an Archetype?
Star Trek Meant I Had A Future 
Throwing Shorts Away with Throwing Axes   video
A Definition of the Martial Arts
Two Collections and One Novel Now Available on Kindle 
Speak Loudly, Do The Ghosts We Carry  
This Thanksgiving I am Thankful for YOU 
Goodbye, Stan. EXCELSIOR!  
The Stranglers meet the Mystery Men  
Dear Dear.  A trail cam vid and 150th post!      video
A Rocket, A Tesla, and Some Horse Poop Walk Into a Bar   
How Creativity Works   
'He said, She said' aka 'Coyote Argument, Mostly Chemical'   video
Something to Chew On About Zombies and the Living  
Hello Kitty and the Vermont Comic Con 
Wise Words, Parallel Worlds 
Happy Fourth of July (with a few well deserved shout-outs) 
Of Life and Gratitude (not my usual kind of post)
I Am the Terror That Croaks in The Night
Predatory Remains of the Calcium Kind
My Everyday On This Planet 
Welcome to Night Vale, the All Hail tour 2017  
Happy New Year 2017, Humanity!
We Want Your Business
Baby It's Cold Outside: Revisionism, Clickbait, and Bullshit. Any Questions?
Did You Hear That?


Digging for an Oak Island interview  (Attempted)
Robert Clotworthy: You Know His Voice 
The 12,500 yr old Interview. Kind of…    (Graham Hancock attempted)
So this guy on the Great Space Coaster walks up to me at a con…  
This Interview Would Have Been Bullshit   (Matt Page aka Master Ken attempted)
Here’s to hope! (Tsoukalos attempted)
Strongarm Interview 3: Dr. Steel 
Strongarm Interview #2 Smeff 
Strongarm Interview: John "Widgett" Robinson


Trying to bring Kung Fu movie sounf effects into the real world !NEW! video  
Doctor Strange 2 to be MCU's first horror film. Sweet. 
Funko's Alien 40th Anniversary Breakfast Cereal
Star Trek TOS Set Tour: Set Phasers to IMPRESSIVE!
SCP-4082 "Real Heavy" (A SCP submission. REJECTED)
Farewell Steve Ditko, Harlan Ellison, and Cinamon Hadley
Cinemassacre interviews Joe Bob Briggs. A post for fellow B-movie fans.
Skyrim on Alexa: The joke that FUS RO DAH'd into reality 
How I Built My Floating Deck on Uneven Ground    video 
The Nightmare Before Christmas on Broadway?   video
Proof of Time Travel. YOU CAN RELAX NOW! 
Touch My Anchor and I'll F*#% You Up! 
Slowing It Down   video
Where is your center?  video
My Captain America Shield is done!   video
The Circle of Internet Life
Cooking With Vsauce
Geek Moms and Geek Dads  
Hail! Our new Alien rulers!  
WALL-E you look at that! 
TAKE MY MONEY. LEGO® Scooby-Doo Sets and...YOURS?!


My First Renn Fest! Huzzah!
From Bellicose to Vericose
Putting the Mental back into Mental Illness (Updated)
Dear Sump Pump 
Sam's 2016 Presidential Campaign Updates  video playlist
If I am elected your President  
Sam for President? 
You Can't Go Home Again
Kill It With Fire!
I'd buy that for a dollar!    
A Retinue of Reviews 
Beauty and the Beastmaster 
Six months of insurance sales hell 
Visiting Hours. A true ghost(?) story.

Monday, September 28, 2020

Trying to bring Kung Fu movie sound effects into the real world

A video in which I (poorly) try to duplicate some Kung Fu movie sound effects in the real world using the guts of a (cheap) motion activated toy. A proof of concept, if you will. I know someone more skilled than I can make this happen. I believe in you!

Be well!


Tuesday, July 7, 2020

"The Second Going" by Yeets

    The Second Going
        By Yeets

   Buffering and refreshing in the widening gyre   
   The vote cannot hear the voice;
   Things fall apart; the center is naught to behold;
   Monetized anarchy is loosed upon the world,
   The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere   
   Innocence is drowned in the ceremony;
   The best convictions lack all passion, while the worst   
   Are full of intensity.

   Surely some adumbration is at hand;
   Surely the Second Going is at hand.   
   The Second Going! Hardly are those words out   
   When a vast image out of Simulatum Mundi
   Troubles my sight: somewhere in sands of the desert   
   A shape with lion body and the head of a human,   
   A gaze blank and pitiless as the sun,   
   Is slowly moving its thighs, while all about it   
   Reel shadows of the ignorant desert birds.   
   The darkness drops again; but now I know   
   That twenty-one centuries of stony sleep
   Were vexed by a nightmare hand rocking the cradle,   
   And what rough beast, its hour come round at last,   
   Slouches towards Bethlehem.com to be born?

Tuesday, June 9, 2020

The 2020 Post: Humans, History, and Hope.

History will tell many tales of this latest pandemic, if history tells us anything. Some we today may scarcely recognize depending on how differently the night sky looks in those future ages. Yet, even then they will hold value. Ancient stories still strike intimate chords today, still carry Truths to teach. Fortunately, we won’t have to wait that long. Clever humans, at this very moment, are weaving medicinal tapestries from the threads of daily events. When their looms will stop, I do not know. I can say many will carry fear long afterward. This is understandable. Disease is only a little younger than Life itself, let us remember. The Fourth Rider and its pale steed have always cast a cold shadow near our doorway. Will it enter? Will it pass? we ask in the long night. And what of the shadow’s umbra? Its name is Uncertainty, mother of Panic. As I said, flinching in their presence is understandable.

I offer these words as a small balm for the stream of tribulations 2020 seems hellbent on throwing at us: We’ve been through worse. We’ve learned from it. We’ll get through this.

Our ancestors braved storms and gales to travel unexplored oceans.
Our ancestors raised structures of breathtaking height and sophistication around the globe. Some of which we, who now plan to walk the surface of Mars, still cannot fully explain or replicate.  
They invented Art and Philosophy and Music and the Scientific Process.
They dug themselves out from under earthquake rubble to rebuild larger and stronger than before.
They set aside time for special celebrations despite (and to spite) the precariousness of daily life.
They saw lobsters and boldly declared I am going to eat that! With butter!
They survived other humans.  

All of human history is within YOU. Give yourself the gift of learning about your past. It is your birthright. Your inheritance. Rest upon it. Take strength from it.  

Then, gentle reader, please help ME remember to do the same! I have those dark, cold nights, too. What reminded me this time round was a re-watching of the extended version of “The Lord of The Rings” trilogy. My hope was the pandemic would have long passed when the final credits rolled. Alas, no such luck. Instead, two ideas smacked my skullcap. The first was Theoden’s story arc. I have no idea how the tragedy of his character eluded me all those previous viewings. Some squirrels don’t make it to the top of the tree, as the old saying I just made up goes. Much has been written about him over the decades (I’ve since learned) so no need to expand that. The second smack came from a visual. Felt like a hammer. Here is the clip posted by Warner Brothers Entertainment on YouTube.  

Every time I see the families in the cave it gets me. Every. Damn. Time.

Orcs, Humans, Elves, and a stone wall. It dawned on me that this scene is an analogy of human history, and by extension a broad model of the human psyche. Let’s start with that wall. A wall is a line lifted into the third dimension. Its sole purpose is to set boundaries. This one is scarred from the many times it fulfilled its role as protector. Outside the gate comes destruction and chaos under the cover of night. Animalistic yet not unintelligent, Orcs are a constant threat. They steal, kill, burn, or destroy to suit their own ends. They are kept in check by strength alone, ruled by strength alone. These new Orcs, however, are far worse. They have been augmented and organized by the intellect of a once ally. Behind the wall stand humans and Elves. And Gimli. Elves are everything Orcs are not. Remember, Orcs were created by the purposeful spoiling of Elves. They are negative images of each other in both action and thought. Elves embody grace and order. They value knowledge and taught the Ents to speak in the deep past. Then we have humans. They exist in a mired middle ground between Elf and Orc. Humans can embody grace and knowledge. We can demonstrate bravery and kindness. We can also grow apathetic or spiteful. Indifference leads to stagnation. Wisdom rots from memory until what’s left is human in form, but Orc in spirit and nature. The Wildmen were aptly named.
The battle was new to the participants, but the setting was old: a line, an enemy, and a battle to survive. Change the names. Adjust the ideologies. Martin Luther attacks the walls of a religious bureaucracy with words nailed to a door. La Malinche whispers a calculated suggestion into Cortez’s ear to guide his eye toward victory over the Aztec empire. Dr. Ignaz Semmelweis argues handwashing saves women’s lives despite the fierce objections of colleagues and the medical establishment. A victim of violence, slavery, and hunger decides stability must be imposed upon his world, thus Temujin becomes Genghis Khan. Off the Cuban coast in a Russian sub, Commodore Vasili Arkhipov weighs patriotism and sworn duty against the fire of nuclear holocaust. Lenny Bruce keeps using schoolyard vulgarities in front of adult audiences.  

And again. And again. 

The Established battling The New. Rulers battling Revolutionaries. The Invaded battling Invaders. Home battling Visitors. Brother Order twirling with Sister Chaos across the floor of Time without a care, save only for their dance. We live in their wake. We are of their wake. Life, after all, depends on them, not the other way round. Humans can see the dance, for some reason. Seems that way, anyhow. I think it’s linked to knowing we’re mortal. Most days I suspect the perception of personal mortality (I have an ending?!) came first. Something went into our Options and switched off the ‘Live In The Moment’ setting. Time and Memory orbited a new version of Self thereby inventing questions, which lead to symbolic language to ask better questions. The primal, predatory Why? was born. Maybe it was the Dance that changed our Options settings. Maybe. Whatever the reason, our mind’s “Territory” dial turned to Eleven to match our rapidly expanding mental landscape. We drafted metaphysical lines, build mental walls, and dropped symbols on whichever side of the map worked best for achieving our needs. Flags, ink, and paper replaced urine. I wonder sometimes if early material maps looked that dissimilar from mental ones. Here be monsters might be truer than we thought. Do they look dissimilar today in our enlightened, sophisticated current year? All maps tell a story, so probably not. As Robert Anton Wilson used to point out, “The menu is not the meal.” Which is, of course paraphrasing Alfred Korzybski’s, “The map is not the territory.” and “The word is not the thing.” Both were influenced by the Surrealist movement in art. (The human mind? Surreal?) Perhaps you’ve seen this piece from ninety-one years ago.

“The Treachery of Images” by Rene Magritte 1929

Perhaps you know this other work by Rene.

“The Son of Man” 1964. I’ll let you decide how it fits in to my words.

Let’s briefly turn back to Middle Earth for a possible explanation for the above.      

Orcs = ID
Humans = Ego
Elves = Super-Ego

Helm’s Deep as a model of one model of the intermingling operators within our psyche. This popped into mind when I asked myself why (There’s the old thorn again.) human history seems so repetitive. Then I remembered how old and cliché even asking the damn question is!

What has been will be again,
what has been done will be done again;
there is nothing new under the sun.
                                                                          Ecclesiastes 1:9   Circa 935 BCE

That was almost three-thousand-years ago. Put another way: Thirty centuries ago, humans were complaining there was nothing good on television, movies were all the same, and new music sounded like recycled crap. Nothing changes. Similar software running on similar hardware yielding similar results. My words have been written before. They will be written again. The cycle triumphant.

And yet.

Our ancestors braved storms and gales to travel uncharted oceans.
Our ancestors raised structures of breathtaking height and sophistication around the globe. Some of which we, who now plan to walk the surface of Mars, still cannot fully explain or replicate. 
They invented Art and the Scientific Process and Philosophy and Music.
They dug themselves out from under earthquake rubble to rebuild larger and stronger than before.
They set aside time for special celebrations despite, and to spite, the precariousness of daily life.
They saw lobsters and boldly declared I am going to eat that! With butter!
They survived other humans. 

But, Sam. You’re hopefully asking. Aren’t you contradicting yourself by making large number level observations on human behavior while citing those specific individuals? They all altered this immutable cycle you’re rambling on about despite having been a byproduct of it. 

Noticed that, did you? Yeah. Funny how individuals can do that. Funny how a single person can tip a scale carrying millions. Funny how the Dance sometimes sways to a single person moving to their own music. It’s almost as if there is an odd profundity to the Individual that’s fueled by the nature of their intent. And it just so happens I am talking to an individual at this very moment.   

Oh no, don’t drag me into this. I have enough on my plate. 

Ever wonder when Hope was invented? 

I’m wondering when this blog will end and hoping it’s soon.

Not the ‘wanting’ hope, the visionary Hope. The 'look around and wonder how better existence could be' Hope. 

Invented? You mean like a light switch or diet soda? Never thought of it that way. Weird to think that Hope didn’t exist until the second it did. But, “invent”? Is that the correct word?

Someone wiser than foolish me probably has a better one. Still, somewhere along our long path with all the hints of ages lost, there was a moment when Hope came into being. We’ve never let it go since. Maybe that was in our Options, too? To install the Hope DLC, press X. Who knows how many names or origins or sources we’ve given it over the millennia. Think about all the greeting cards that never would have existed without it.

A staggering observation.

I deal in the hard Truths. Explains why I don’t sleep well at night. 

So, take your own advice.

What do you mean?

You’re going to great lengths to encourage people to have Hope, to use Hope, based on what humans have endured since humans existed. Pandemic upheavals sparked this blog, but 2020 was just warming up. Here’s the reminder you asked for: We have endured much, yet still created much. We have endured much, yet still done much good. We’ve an established track record that doesn’t need platitudes, because we invented platitudes. We can picture the possible, then marry the image to action. A human is a spec of flotsam bobbing on an ocean of time that miraculously found ways to build ships and draw maps in the Hope of one day harnessing the storms that threaten to drown them. That’s you. That's Us. Don’t forget it.

Huh...you got me figured out. 

Of course, I do. I am you. I know what you know. I know what you’ve been through. 

I can't argue with a good point. Can I ask you, er, me some clarifying questions? I feel like we’ve just scratched the surface of all this...........Hello? 


I guess it’s just you and me again, gentle reader. Interesting. We’re all a product of and a producer of. And more. We often fall under the step of the Dance, yet sometimes we pick the beat. We can make decisions. Well, I certainly gave myself a lot to think about. 

I Hope I gave you something worth thinking about, too.

Be well. Stay well. 

I believe in you, fellow human.