Tuesday, May 16, 2023

Your Guide To Easy Reading



-WELCOME, GENTLE READER-

And Lo! An index was born.

!NEW! posts are marked accordingly. History. Science. Fiction. Horror. Comedy. Pop Culture. Commentary. Interviews. DIY's. Lots to see here so look around and have fun. 

My Amazon Author page with three collections of my favorite short works, 
along with my science fiction novel "Saint Five" CLICK HERE 
 
I also have a YouTube channel. CLICK HERE. 

If I you laughed, learned, found something new, or just liked what you read then please consider supporting my work by buying me a coffee. It is much appreciated. Thank you.
 

 
Be well! 

And so should you!


FICTION 

Awake at a Wake  - in which four people sharing a long history find themselves in a funeral parlor - 
The Wedding Piece (Southern Gothic for Tracey and Alex)
They are at the window again  (It's a love story. With zombies.)
The Death of Joe Average  (What happens when the deathtrap works?)



CREATIVE TYPES! HELP ME FIND A HOME FOR THESE IDEAS!
-Read this first-   
A most delightful...dump. 


Potatoes are what we eat. Potatoes are what we ride


HISTORICAL

"The Second Going" by Yeets  

Maggot's Work - A poem. A story. A life.  
A Definition of the Martial Arts
Two Collections and One Novel Now Available on Kindle 
Speak Loudly, Do The Ghosts We Carry  
This Thanksgiving I am Thankful for YOU 
Goodbye, Stan. EXCELSIOR!  
The Stranglers meet the Mystery Men  
ALL FIXED! THANKS, POLITICS!   video
Dear Dear.  A trail cam vid and 150th post!      video
A Rocket, A Tesla, and Some Horse Poop Walk Into a Bar   
How Creativity Works   
'He said, She said' aka 'Coyote Argument, Mostly Chemical'   video
Something to Chew On About Zombies and the Living  
Hello Kitty and the Vermont Comic Con 
Wise Words, Parallel Worlds 
Happy Fourth of July (with a few well deserved shout-outs) 
Of Life and Gratitude (not my usual kind of post)
I Am the Terror That Croaks in The Night
Predatory Remains of the Calcium Kind
My Everyday On This Planet 
Welcome to Night Vale, the All Hail tour 2017  
Happy New Year 2017, Humanity!
We Want Your Business
STOP READING THIS BLOG 
Baby It's Cold Outside: Revisionism, Clickbait, and Bullshit. Any Questions?
Did You Hear That?



INTERVIEWS AND INTERVIEWS THAT NEVER HAPPENED

Digging for an Oak Island interview  (Attempted)
Robert Clotworthy: You Know His Voice 
The 12,500 yr old Interview. Kind of…    (Graham Hancock attempted)
So this guy on the Great Space Coaster walks up to me at a con…  
This Interview Would Have Been Bullshit   (Matt Page aka Master Ken attempted)
Here’s to hope! (Tsoukalos attempted)
Strongarm Interview 3: Dr. Steel 
Strongarm Interview #2 Smeff 
Strongarm Interview: John "Widgett" Robinson



STUFF YOU MAY FIND INTERESTING

Trying to bring Kung Fu movie sounf effects into the real world video  
Doctor Strange 2 to be MCU's first horror film. Sweet. 
Funko's Alien 40th Anniversary Breakfast Cereal
Star Trek TOS Set Tour: Set Phasers to IMPRESSIVE!
SCP-4082 "Real Heavy" (A SCP submission. REJECTED)
Farewell Steve Ditko, Harlan Ellison, and Cinamon Hadley
Cinemassacre interviews Joe Bob Briggs. A post for fellow B-movie fans.
Skyrim on Alexa: The joke that FUS RO DAH'd into reality 
How I Built My Floating Deck on Uneven Ground    video 
The Nightmare Before Christmas on Broadway?   video
Proof of Time Travel. YOU CAN RELAX NOW! 
Touch My Anchor and I'll F*#% You Up! 
Slowing It Down   video
Where is your center?  video
My Captain America Shield is done!   video
The Circle of Internet Life
Cooking With Vsauce
Geek Moms and Geek Dads  
Hail! Our new Alien rulers!  
WALL-E you look at that! 
TAKE MY MONEY. LEGO® Scooby-Doo Sets and...YOURS?!
(Not new anymore) NEW STUFF NEW STUFF NEW STUFF



IT INVOLVES ME FOR SOME ODD REASON

Upstate Gold - An Upstate New York spin on a Californian one-hit wonder

- A tip of the hat, a nod and a wink to Upstate New York. Some (hopefully) amusing few minutes for your day. Enjoy. -

The idea popped into my head and refused to leave. Build a version of John Stewart's 1979 hit "Gold" around a patently better geographical area: Upstate New York. I'm not saying it was a GOOD idea, but it was FUN idea. "Upstate Gold". Listen to the original (convenient YouTube link below, you are very welcome) while reading my lyrics. You'll get the idea. I hope you have some fun with it, too. Three helpful points and one confession before we begin. One. In case you were unaware, a parlor is the dedicated area on a dairy farm where milking happens. Two. WIRY (pronounced wiry) is radio station in Plattsburgh, NY which has been on the air since January 30th, 1950. Three. Stewart's is a very popular regional chain of gas station/convenience stores. Confession. My wife is an Adirondack girl, so I may be a tad biased.
 

Upstate Gold
by Sam Girdich

When the lights go down in an Upstate New York town
People aren’t in for the evening
They jump into their car and use Stewart’s as their bar
Hot Michigans there for the eatin’
Drivin' down the Northway, eleven months of snow
The people up there know their history is gold 
 
Ah, my buddy Tom Pows he’s a-workin’ milkin’ cows
As his herd heads in to a parlor
He’s got rhythm in his hands as he's wiping down the cans
Sings to WIRY in the shower
Drivin' down the Northway, eleven months of snow
The people up there know their history is gold 
 
Ah, Adirondack girls are the greatest in the world
Each night a dream in the waiting
Singin' life to me I get high on melody
Each heart a home in the makin’
Drivin' down the Northway, eleven months of snow
The people up there know their history is gold
 
Drivin' down the Northway, eleven months of snow
The people up there know their history is gold 
 
When the lights go down in an Upstate NY town
People aren’t in for the evening
They jump into their car and use Stewart’s as their bar
Hot Michigans there for the eatin’
Drivin' down the Northway, eleven months of snow
The people up there know their history is gold 
 
Drivin' down the Northway, eleven months of snow
people up there know their history is gold
people up there know their history is gold
people up there know their history is gold
(Ooh, yeah)
people up there know their history is gold, is gold
people up there know their history is gold, is gold
people up there know their history is gold, is gold
(Gotta sing)
people up there know their history is gold, is gold
(Tappin' dem maple trees)
people up there know their history is gold, is gold
(shovelin’ out the front door)
people up there know their history is gold, is gold
 
 
John Stewart's "Gold" as found on YouTube. Lots of uploads to pick from there.
 

 

Be well!
Sam
 
 

Sunday, November 27, 2022

Ancient Aliens Live Tour 2022: A brief review of one stop

Ancient Aliens Live Tour 2022: A brief review of one stop.

 

Left to right. Nick Pope, Dr. Travis Taylor, William Henry, David Childress, and Giorgio Tsoukalos 

 

I had fun. The end.



November 20th, 2022. After a crawling, white knuckled drive head-on into a snow band, fingers and ass firmly clenched for dear life, we arrived. Proctor’s Theater. Good Lord, this had better be worth it.

First Observation: A rowdy, engaged crowd.

We saw aluminum, er, tin foil hats. People posed for pictures in front of a small inflatable(?) green alien. The bar was VERY busy. Not sure what I was expecting, but a concert-like atmosphere wasn’t it. The format was as follows. Nick Pope -a show regular and former British Ministry of Defense employee- asking prepared questions to the other speakers. Yes, the questions and answers were largely canned (with perhaps some improv), but that made sense. Events MUST have a format to conform to schedule. Anyone who has worked a road crew or even a college event crew knows events are planned. They must be. Nick would ask a random question from an established, printed list. The participants quickly reviewed their prepared answers from which to leap from. This allowed the production company to have clips at the ready. A few in the audience mistook this question/answer format as an invitation for group participation. Answers, theories, and buzz words were flung at the stage, sometimes completing sentences and thoughts the speakers needed no help finishing. Machu Picchu was a, “…FOUNDRY!” Alien bases are, “…UNDERWATER!” “THEY lied!” And so on. There was one hush-toned, “Tell her I am sorry I spilled beer on her seat.” That one was obviously not aimed at the stage, but na├»ve Sam still didn’t expect to hear it. Folly on me. Overall, positive energy combined with an invested audience. Nice.


Second Observation: The investigators behaved the same in person as they appeared after filming.

“It's easier to face the camera than life. As in the former the script is known.”
― 
Haresh Sippy

Seeing live the same body language, mannerisms, and expressions of thought seen on the show was refreshing. It is one thing to film a show with final product birthed from the hindsight of multiple takes and producers, and quite another to sit bare before a live audience. The speakers were relaxed. They were amongst fans, true, but not sheep. Strong opinions roamed the hall, remember. The speakers were loose shouldered. They appeared to honestly and openly reiterate their answers. They appeared to genuinely believe what they were saying. The words were not for dramatic affect. I liked that.



Third Observation: YOU are responsible for your thoughts and beliefs. 

The show ended only after each participant gave a closing thought. Across the board the messages were: ‘Keep learning. Read more. Don’t believe everything you see or hear. Hold to your educated beliefs until the facts say otherwise. We (on stage) respect each other, but even we do not agree 100% with each other.’

Let that sink in. Let the speakers, subject matter, and general level of public ridicule of those speakers coalesce. I asked myself if I was being snookered by those who know promoting apparent skepticism is in their economic self-interest. Hadn’t Robert Anton Wilson taught us to ponder daily if we were Useful Idiots at any given movement? So, I asked. Nope. Seemed genuine. In summary to Observation Three: “Their culture passed forever into to the unlit, dusty halls of history from a desire for facts and the pursuit of truth.” said no historian ever. A sprinkle of hyperbole, I know. Let a guy dream about what we could be. I watched a lot of Trek growing up.

Now we shall speak of final thoughts in the rapid, modern fashion. Were the time and resources invested to attend “Ancient Aliens Live” worth it? For me, yes. Did I learn anything new? Two things. That Dr, Travis Taylor was a leading (if not albeit briefly “chief”) scientist on the U.S. government’s Unidentified Aerial Phenomena Task Force. Interesting. Also, the creator of "Ancient Aliens" Kevin Burns was a local from Niskayuna, NY. He went to high school about three miles from our venue. Neat. Do I agree with the general Paleo-SETI theory? Generally, no. Is it possible? Yes. Why yes? Because the Ancient Alien theory smacks a bit too close to the meddling us humans do. Do I think we have a grasp on remote human history? Good Lord, no. I hum a more Graham Hancock tune there. Should the unwashed persist with vexing questions to all the mainstreams? Yes. A thousand times, yes. I am reminded of Leonard Nimoy’s rendition of Ehrmann’s poem “Desiderata.” “You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.” You have a right and duty to question your world, just as you also have a duty and responsibility learn and grow from your decisions.

Be questioning, my friends. Of Yourself and the World around you.

 Oh yeah! One more thing...


I bought a pin! Huzzah! It is a Quimbaya or Golden Flyer. Some say it represents a plane as seen in ancient times (ergo the group pic above) by the Quimbaya peoples in South America. All the cool UFO, er, UAP kids wear one.

Be well.

Sam